Thursday, December 30, 2010
Our First Week Home...
She is still sleeping in our room (on a toddler bed) and "waking up" several times in the middle of the night but she just tosses and turns, whines a bit, and goes back to sleep really quick. I cannot help but wonder what she is dreaming about. You can tell by her face she is really processing some heavy things. She also talks in her sleep sometimes and it sounds pretty intense. Sometimes she sounds like she is telling someone off. I can only imagine what is going through her head right now.
Logan and Mia are also continuing to do great! Logan is so nurturing and loving toward Mia. I am so proud of him I could burst. That said, Logan did tell me yesterday that he felt like Mia was getting all the attention. I knew that day was going to come. I am kinda bummed because I have been trying so hard to make him feel special. I am sure it is tough going from being the only child to "insta" brother to a 4 year old little girl who speaks Mandarin. And, the truth is, she IS getting a lot of attention but so is he. Logan and I sat down and talked about it and he seems to totally understand, I just think he is going to have some tough moments. I was a middle child (and Logan is so much like me) so I totally understand how he is feeling.
Separation is something we are continuing to work on with Mia. When Logan went to play at a friends for an hour the other day, she absolutely lost it. She cried, and cried Logan's name while standing at the window and looking for him. She did not want to be comforted or distracted (although we tried). After about 40 minutes we called Logan and when she heard his voice she stopped crying...until we hung up of course. Logan being the great big brother came home for her. I cannot blame her. She has had so many people she loved just walk out the door and never come back. It was not just her parents, it was also her nannies (who she loved dearly) and many friends who were adopted. She is okay if she leaves with Mike or myself and telling the other one bye, but if she is the one being left it is not a good thing. My parents stopped by yesterday to pick her up for a quick hour play date at their house and she had no problems telling us goodbye and going with them. Apparently she was an angel so that is a relief. Yesterday, I got my coat and shoes on and told her bye-bye. She said, no, no, no. I told her I needed to go bye-bye and that I would be right back. I was only going to the mail box but wanted her to know that I will leave and come back. Getting the mail seemed to be a good place to start with that lesson. While she watched me leave and looked like she was going to cry, she did not. Small baby steps! We are getting there.
We have not had to use the time out chair for 2 days! She is so agreeable and should she start to have a moment with attitude or telling us how it is going to be we just ask her if she wants to go to time out. She shakes her head no and does whatever it is we need her to do. I (and Mike) have always been a big believer in kids having boundaries. We believe kids are much happier when they know what is expected of them and can predict the consequence should they make a bad choice. I knew we would use time out with her but I did not know we would introduce it so soon. I also did not know if she would respond to it the way Logan did. We do use it different with her because she is adopted. When we would put Logan in time out we would walk away and ignore him until the time out was over. With Mia, and because being abandoned again is such a fear of hers (the nannies said that the only thing that scared Mia was being alone) we sit next to her but still do not talk or look at her. Anyway, time out is definitely the thing that works for Mia. Again, WHOOOOO for the time out chair.
She continues to be SUCH a joy playing with all her girly things and us experiencing all of her "firsts". She cracks me up all the time. She also warms my heart with her kisses and hugs and is now saying "I love you too Mama". MELT!!! Hearing her little footsteps as she runs here and there is so sweet. The way she says "hello kitty" to our cat Alexi is too cute. I just love, love, love this little girl.
Mike and I are still a bit tired but nothing too major. I am SO grateful for not getting sick either while we were in China or when we came home. SO MANY people that I have followed over the years during their trips to China make coming home and getting on a new schedule as well as the adjustment period for the kids sound like a total nightmare. I am happy to report it has been pretty good for us! :) Now it is time to start to introduce Mia to all our friends! :)
That's all for now.
Happy New Year to all of you and God Bless!
Monday, December 27, 2010
We are home and completely in love!
Hot Chocolate on Christmas Morning! |
Logan and Mia - First Christmas as a family of 4! |
The 3 of us |
My excited boy! |
A mountain of presents! |
Loving her princess things! |
Relaxing with my little ones |
Mike making the peace sign he learned from the hotties in China |
Mia and her noodles |
Check out all those noodles! |
Helping Mom bake while eating |
Monday, December 20, 2010
Day 9
Her TB result was good! So she is being sworn in as a US citizen tomorrow (Tuesday 12/20/2010) at 1:30pm. All of the legalities are complete. We start heading back home on Wednesday. We leave late afternoon for Beijing, and after a quick overnight stay we start the 13+ hour flight home.
We've had a good day today, no real fits or anything. She's been pretty happy all day. She likes riding in a stroller around the island. She's a little too big for it, but we couldn't carry her anymore, she's too big and heavy. Lots of people stop and talk to her. Lots of people ask us what provence she is from because they say she is very beautiful. She has dimples when she smiles and it looks like she has two lines on each of her cheeks. She has a birth mark on her back as well. All of the shop workers like talking to her. An older woman, we are guessing 90 or so, came up to her and Debbie and was telling JingJing how lucky she is and how good Debbie was for taking care of her. At least that is what we are guessing. We've been told a lot of the older generation think the little girls are very lucky for going to America. Some of the younger generation doesn't really agree with Westerners coming over for the girls. But overall people have been really nice to us.
We figured out last night that she has used chopsticks, she understands how they work, but she is not the most efficient with them. We're guessing the orphanage just used spoons for everything.
Mike just uploaded some pictures but apparently China is not happy because we're now being blocked. We are unable to see them or add captions. Mike's guessing he's blocked because he has been tagging the previous photos with "China". It may be a fluke, but he's thinking not because we were able to access Flickr yesterday but not today. Many popular sites are blocked here. I can't edit my blog directly, we have to email in the updates. Hopefully everyone can see see the pics here, we'll add captions when we can:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mkrisher/sets/72157625510583409/
Mike woke up this morning not feeling the best and thought for sure he was going to be sick for 24 hours, but it quickly passed. A number of people, including all of the males in our travel group have been sick, including vomiting. We've been lucky so far. We're getting tired though, it's been a long two weeks. Today was back to Shamian Island to get her TB results and then about 4 hours of shopping. The weather was great. Maybe 70 degrees and sunny. We picked up a lot. Prices are pretty good. Hopefully we can get it all back in our luggage. We learned some more about Shamian Island. All of the buildings are protected by the government. Most of the buildings are occupied by Europeans for their consulate offices and businesses. It's really pretty amazing. We've both said numerous times we could move here. The weather is nice, the people are nice. The currency exchange is in our favor. We didn't expect to really like China, but our vision of it was completely wrong. We have a lot more photos and videos that we haven't posted. We'll do more when we get back to the States and have a faster connection.
Tonight we think we are going to just get McDonalds and stay in, we are pretty tired. Hopefully JingJing will be as well, she didn't sleep well last night she kept having dreams and screaming no and yelling at someone (it was probably us). We can't take pictures at the swearing in ceremony unfortunately, but we may have more pics to post tomorrow depending on what we do afterwards.
She has learned some more english. She now says "no" maybe a quarter of the time and still uses the Mandarin word 75 percent of the time. She says "uh oh" now when something spills. She says "ketchup" all the time. She understands what "take a bath" means. She says "hota hota" when something is hot. She adds an a to a lot of words. She says "carry please" when she wants carried. She asks for "help". She says "open". She's working on "on" and "off". She's working on "no thank you". She says "I love you" but doesn't really know what it means. She understands "sit down". She understands what "all done" means, but still says the Mandarin version. She says "hello" and "bye bye" a lot. We expect she will probably speak mostly english within 4 months. She's picking up things pretty quickly.
I have to tell you this...I am completely amazed by this little girl. She has been through so much in her short little life and at times it shows. We have had some terrible drag down battles of will a couple of times but they are getting shorter and shorter each time. She is realizing that we are the boss and that we love her without all the drama. She is testing us for sure. That aside, we are so completely in love with this little girl. When I think of everything she has been through and is still willing to trust and love, it blows my mind. I simply adore her and am so honored to be her mother. This truly is the child I have been waiting and praying for. She is so funny and cracks me up all the time. She is also VERY STUBBORN and definitely has an opinion. I can respect that! :) Ugh....words simply cannot describe how I feel. Blessed...I guess blessed is the right thing. I also feel completed. I did not realize that I was not completed without her until I met her and that was it. I cannot imagine breathing without her in my life. Okay, starting to get all gushy. I will post again when I can. Miss you all but LOVING China and this special time with my incredibly amazing, strong, funny, loving, cute, girl. Mike has also been such a loving and wonderful dad. So proud of him. I cannot describe how it feels to see him so smitten with his little girl.
Day 7 & 8
We left Nanjing yesterday and made our way to Ghuangzhou. The morning started out OK, but JingJing decided she didn't really want to pack, she just wanted to go and ended up throwing a fit and crying herself to sleep on the floor. After finally getting around, we took off for the airport hoping she wouldn't be car sick. We got lucky and she fell asleep in the car. Once at the airport we got checked in and said good bye to our guide Michael. He has spoken english for 20 years. He was really good at it. But he can't come to the States for more than 2 weeks, because China won't approve it. They are nervous that anyone over 30 will simply leave the country and never return if they leave for more than 2 weeks, so Visas are only granted for 2 weeks max. Nanjing was nice but we were looking forward to being with the other families in Ghuangzhou.
JingJing seemed pretty excited to see the planes. And was excited to get on ours. Unfortunately we sat there for a half hour after boarding. She grew tired of being strapped in during that time. Once we were moving she settled down some, but started looking like she wasn't feeling good. Luckily, she feel asleep again. After a quick 2 hour flight we landed in Ghuangzhou where it was 57 degrees. We were welcoming the warm up. It was as cold in Nanjing as it is in Fort Wayne. Ghuangzhou became Mike's favorite city to fly into at nighttime. It is a large city and everything is lit up. There is a river running through the middle and the bridges are lined with neon lights. The buildings are lit up like the casinos in Vegas. It was really amazing.
Once we reunited with our guide from Beijing, Allison, we were off to the hotel. JingJing did the car ride like a champ. She talked to us and played games on the iPad. She saw a picture of Logan on Mike's shoulders and decided she wanted to try that as soon as we got to the hotel. And the hotel is really really nice. 5 stars! A number of Americans work here as well. This is probably one of the nicest hotels Mike and I have ever stayed at. It is huge. The Paralympics are here right now as well, so the hotel is full. You have to put your bags through an airport scanner when you get here. That was a little strange. There are 4 restaurants and some shopping. There is a Starbucks downstairs and the McDonalds down the street delivers we've been told. Tomorrow we are doing some local Thai restaurant for lunch with the group and it is supposed to be really good.
Today was her medical exam. All seemed to go well, except at the end when she got her TB test. She was not happy about getting a shot in her forearm. She cried for a good twenty minutes. For some reason she has been all about Mike today. She wanted him to carry her all day. Wanted to sit with him all day. Had to go downstairs with him to get bottled water and soda. Today has been the first day she has chosen Mike over me. We're thinking it is because I woke her up and got her dressed. She can hold a grudge.
After the medical we walked around Shamian Island. It was amazing. Mike and I both feel like we could see ourselves moving to Ghuangzhou. The city is really nice. Shamian Island is really cool. Lots of parks and old english style buildings. Mike posted pictures of people doing Tai Chi in the park. We ate outside. It was mid sixties and completely sunny, that was nice. After getting back to the hotel we did our final set of paperwork and paid our last fee. We should be getting her Visa on Tuesday or Wednesday so we can leave. She threw a fit while we were doing the paperwork. Mike took her back to the room with him to retrieve some papers he had left. She screamed and cried the whole way up to the room. She has some lungs, everyone looks at us, it is quite embarrassing. Once up in the room she learned how dad say no very sternly. Up to this point we've kind of spoiled her but she's testing us now that she realizes we are her parents, so it's time to start correcting her. She's not happy about it. So we've had a couple of meltdowns like we've anticipated with adopting a toddler. She doesn't like being told no, but the screaming afterwards is getting shorter already.
It's been a long two days and we are beat. She hasn't had a nap today at all so we are hoping she'll pass out early and we can get some sleep. Tomorrow should be relatively easy. We have a group photo and then some shopping and leisure. We are learning more and more Mandarin every day. We can't understand every single sentence or understand the songs she sings, but we are able to communicate much better every single day. And this girl loves watermelon. I think she ate a whole melon last night at dinner. That and about three things of Strawberry mousse. And everything she wears has to be pink. Talk about particular!
Unless her TB test comes back bad on Monday (which it looks fine, so we should be fine), we are in the final stretch and should be taking the oath to make her a US citizen, Tuesday at 1:30.
Pics from yesterday: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mkrisher/sets/72157625495917105/
Pics from today: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mkrisher/sets/72157625622228054/